i have changed. but the change isnt enough though. at least to make ppl happy.. well. i'm trying as hard as possible to keep things in. i dun wan to say things out cos it will make ppl unhappy and to the extent where it will hurt ppl alot alot alot. i dunno how.. how are things gonna work out. one day if everything just comes out.. i wonder wat will happen to my friendships with others.. i dun wan to hurt anyone. i wan everyone to just be friends.. good friends if possible.. but if they dun think the same way.. they just think that its enough. they've had it.. then i guess... i cant do anything abt it and just try to clear up the mess after that..
when i say i have changed it doesnt mean that i am totally different from last time.. there will be still times when i will still thow temper. there will be times i will be acting my old self. this will be the times when i really can take it anymore.. and sometimes.. i'm just too used to doing things this way, asking things this way.. its impossible to say change! and i change like some robot taking commands.. i am a human too.. like others.. i'm not a robot..
am i doing the right thing? changing myself for the sake of others? by changing my attitude so far, i have gained new friends. i have become better as a person.. its a good thing.. yeah.. so if i am to change myself even further.. for the sake of others not myself.. then i ask myself now... who is rebecca? wats her own character like? why does it seem to always change? why does she seem so different from last year? wat happened to her?
our world cannot revolve around the words me myself and i. then is it gonna revolve around the words u, they, the others? i dunno.
shall stop using the com liao.. its a real hazard to my bro.. he just hit his injured elbow against the table my laptop is on.. uh oh..
